I realize I’m a month late on breaking this story, but I just can’t let such a resounding victory for justice in the War on Terror go unrecognized. You see, the TSA and its body scanners got their man.

Who is this nefarious fiend, you ask?

Kurtis Blow.

Yep.

The Kurtis Blow.

I could not possibly make this up. It is beyond my capacity to concoct a story where a multi-billion dollar, international security enterprise nabs the world’s first gold-certified MC for having less than an ounce of weed in his possession.

You may remember Grooverider languishing in a jail in the United Arab Emirates because he wore the wrong trousers to a gig. That was a terrible injustice.

Fortunately, Blow was not apprehended in Dubai, but rather Los Angeles. At the time of Blow’s arrest, possession of up to one ounce of marijuana for recreational use was little more than a criminal misdemeanor in California. As of just under a week ago, that same offence is a civil infraction.

It’s basically a parking ticket.

Bad timing on the part of Kurtis Blow. But these are not really The Breaks. As I interpret them, the breaks are occurrences of misfortune that almost always fall outside the victim’s control. They do not cover acts of sheer stupidity, like taking your ganja through an airport body scanner.

Although I suppose it’s no more foolish than claiming your cat as a dependent or borrowing money from the mob. And just who, exactly, made those 18 phone calls to Brazil? Come to think of it, Kurtis Blow is not as sympathetic a protagonist as I remember him being.

But we’ve learned two very important things from this event.

First, overarching authorities will spare no expense of cash, technology, manpower or audacity to catch us in the act of doing whatever it is they’re convinced we must be doing. Second, once they’ve caught us, our only hope is that our democratic compatriots have had the courage and foresight to reign in this bullshit as the fine citizens of California have done with SB 1449.